26 Jan 2017
Most of my friends are counting days and hours to 5pm Friday. Weekend. Good morning hangover! Do I remember any of those?
Instead I am wondering day by day how it happened baby Z is nearly 4 months. I just woke up, set kettle for a coffee and it is already evening.
Unbelievable dark view behind the window. Winter. Depressing time. Husband is away, traveling across country at work. Someone has to pay our bills. And I am at home like millions of new mums.
Just a while ago I watched online short video from Channel 4 about loneliness of new mums. That is so much truth.
Day by day. Morning after morning. Smile after smile. Fight for every minute of joy. Making plans which day I will wash my hair or which I will cut my nails. I am a mum and I do really enjoy my occupation. I think that was always my calling to be fulfilled and complete as a parent. Lucky me. It is just sometimes so overwhelming, full of sacrifice. I am not this type of mum I complain I can not go to toilet by myself. Sometimes I go. Even when I am with my baby alone at home. I still have my comfort zone and I do care about it. It is small, that is right. And some days happens when she may sleep all day and I can read a book. But why oh why the world and most of people think I died?
I catch myself all the time: "when I had proper conversation?". And I feel a huge need to talk. My friends were verified very soon after I have had baby.
Yes we do have different priorities now. If I have a choice of party or her smile and cuddly evening I will still choose the second.
Do you think we can talk only about poos, feedings, cooing? Well we, new mums, do talk about those, but between ourselves. I love that someone is able to share with me priceless experience and I love to do the same. But we do also talk as normal people. About current affairs, books, movies... Sad but true - we have sometimes only each other, this small ghetto or enclave for our conversation. That is sad most of our friends just forgot about us. But we are here, probably in greater need to talk with.
Thanks God for all events which are available for mum&baby. That is such a relief, you can get out not only for meaningless stroll, but also you can meet someone else, just like you. I mention below only few of them, which I attended and you can do so even when your baby is still very small. Hope you will find it helpful!
La Leche League Trinity College
That was one of my first social group where I went. Z. was one week old at that time. No troubles with feeding, but I just wanted to get out and find other mums. I still like to go there. See all babies are growing, check what I can expect in few months and if I have any doubts just ask- someone will have a solution for sore nipples, sticky eye or expressing milk- for sure! Those meetings are priceless. I can talk and listen and Z. can sleep and play whenever she likes!
Tots and Tums
One of my first exercises after giving birth. It is a postnatal class for babies and mums. You can practice your pelvic floor and check how you getting on with tummy muscles. I found it very helpful and supportive. Also I met few mums who has children in very same age. It was actually few minutes from our place on Cork Street in Bru Chaomhin - handy! It is just one class, once per month and free of charge.
Many yoga studios has in an offer such classes for you. I went few times and... left very sweaty. Unfortunately studio when I did my pregnancy yoga is far away and trip for us would take ages, so I decided for place in city centre. I caught an idea and Z. did also. Now we have few great exercises we can do together or sometimes we just jump into studio for a class. It is great fun and hard work. I do prefer lighter attitude in yoga, focus on body not workout, so this place did not really work for me, but sometimes you need a push and sweat over your back to feel better. I also learn funny nursery rhymes!
Bring along baby in National Concert Hall
Music and babies are for me perfect combination. So we do play guitar with Z., listen to music. She even has one melody which will calm her down every time or her music box which will make her smile. It is like a magic. So are those concerts. I would say it is very intimate, but audience is large! Toddlers, babies, mums and dads. That is just amazing to gather whole families in lunchtime! There was only two musicians, playing classical music and actually just enough. As far we heard the music it was quiet. All children were so much interested, calm I could not believe it actually happened! Obviously when concert ended everything came back to normal and children made same noise as before. But that hour of music was just priceless! Real must go, but